Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Happy Mothers Day

This is me on Mother's Day, trying to tell myself that I'm a strong, beautiful person that comes from a wonderful legacy of strong, beautiful women. I look at the picture and REALLY want to say otherwise. HOWEVER, this is a good step for all of us. We need to always remember that we are beautiful women and Heavenly Father sees ALOT of potential in us ......why else would He trust us with these??? Right??? Well, we all need reminding from time to time. Especially after the Mother's Day that I had. Cameron was out of town for the weekend. He works for a professional photographer sometimes and this past weekend he traveled to St. Louis to do a gig there.
Sunday morning started out just TOO early for me. Kashton was wide awake at 6:00 and ready to start his day. (Reminding myself: "I'm strong, I'm beautiful")

Church starts at 9:00 for us. Well, by the time 9:00 rolled around, I had a very unhappy little boy who needed a nap. So...I quickly opted to miss Sacrament considering I didn't want to fight a crying baby out in the foyer...and I put him down for a nap. ("I'm strong, I'm beautiful")


Kashton is awake. So I dress him and we're on our way to church. Perfect timing. I'll be able to get to the end of Sunday School and still be able to teach my lesson in YW.

Time for YW:

Kashton is so fussy and I'm so embarrassed (Cameron usually has him while I'm in YW...taking him to class with me is a new thing). The girls are trying to listen to the lesson but are so distracted by my son. I end up walking out of the classroom. Find an empty classroom and the tears started to come. Why does my son ALWAYS do this?? I end up cursing my husband for being out of town on the "special" day that celebrates mothers and here I am...crying in a classroom because sometimes I don't like being a mother. ("I'm strong, I'm beautiful. I can do this.")

I get home from church and Kashton is so tired and ornery that he's having a hard time eating his lunch. The food just ended up all over me, all over him, and me counting to 10 in order to prevent myself from reaching across the tray of the high chair and strangling him. I know it's not his fault.

So tired: He can't fall asleep.

By the time I get him down for a nap, I'm rushing to get ready to go to work (yes, I had to do a show on Sunday) and get everything ready for the babysitter.

Babysitter is late.

I'm late getting to work. I get in a little bit of trouble. ("I'm strong! I can do this")

Cameron redeemed himself. He had some of our friends help him so that when I got to my make-up station at work, there was a palethora of gifts waiting for me. I immediately chastised myself for being angry at him.

Kashton gave me a sweet little card and a gift card to Kohl's so I can buy new pillows for my couch.

Cameron got me a funny card about not being able to remember the fun things we did before Kashton, some beautiful roses and the Sweeney Todd DVD. My employers gave me a corsage. I thought that was very sweet of them.Cameron also got me this amazing figurine which helps remind me again of the potential I have of being a BEAUTIFUL and STRONG WOMAN!!!

My Mother and Father-in-law gave me a beautiful card that my sister-in-law Carlie made and this little tea light.
I ended up getting home late after work because one of my co-workers got sick and I was the only one around to help him. That was a little scary for me.
Cameron was home when I got there. We got in a little argument because he didn't pay the babysitter and sent her home with nothing. I was very embarrassed and mad at him because he never takes on those responsibilities. He just leaves them for me. And Kashton was screaming because he was starving and no one had fed him dinner yet.
Again: Chastised myself. Cameron apologized and made me a WONDERFUL dinner of chicken pasta.
I had a coupon for a spa treatment that I received LAST YEAR for Mothers Day that I had never used. It was a difficult year with a colicky baby and simply...I never really dared (at the time) leave Kashton with a babysitter because he's a little high-maintainance. The coupon expired on Monday, so...I finally (a year later) went in for a day at the spa.
I got this AMAZING Chocolate Spa Pedicure. Yes, they COVERED my legs in dark chocolate.

Look at those amazing, PINK toes!!!

I also received a manicure and a facial. It was SO amazing. I can't believe I waited an entire year to do it. So, I hope you ALL had a wonderful Mother's Day. And remember....we are all strong, beautiful woman. Even if our grass is not mowed, we have 2 inches of re-growth coming out of our scalps, boogers stuck to the shoulders of our blouses, green beans wiped all over our arms, still sporting a fake mothers day corsage the YW gave you, and walking around in your house slippers with your church clothes still on!!!!


Mel said...

Hey there...all I have to say is "first child syndrome." I suffered through gets better. Way to keep reminding yourself like that. Remember, you are living "the dream". I sure admire you, being able to still perform on stage and stick with something you are so good at.

Nemelka said...

I agree with you sometimes you sit back and think to yourself why the heck did I EVER want kids!! I always try to tell myself its not him its me, they are just frustrated because they cant talk and say what they need. Oh and to think in two short months i'll have two crying boys?!? As I said "What the hell was I thinking!!!" Well i am glad your mothers day was an ok one!

Chelsey said...

Being a mom is hard! Mothers day should be at least 10 times a year instead of just once. I'm glad your day worked out better, even though you had to work!

Hacking it up said...

WOW! I'm so sorry you has such a crappy Mother's Day! It can be SO HARD sometimes...lots of times...OK, ALL the time! But like you said, Heavenly Father trusts us, so, we need to trust ourselves too...Madi was a horrible colicky baby too....I feel your pain!! It gets better! Keep plugging along!!!

Lance was in Malaysia for Mother's Day....still is...I think I deserve a day at the spa!!!!! :)
Love ya!

Littletime said...

you are a beauiful girl inside and out and I think its great you can be a mother and still perform as you do. Would love to see you again.

Wyatt said...

Happy Mother's Day, Beth! You're cute family is so adorable. I'm so proud of you guys. What an awesome life!

I miss you so much. I'm actually in UT right now for my little brother's farewell. Wish you were here. Good ol' UT isn't the same with out the "good ol' friends" like you guys!

Wyatt said...
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Annie AKA Emmie Lou said...

Bethers, you are a good woman and I miss you! Think of you a lot! Hope to chat with you sooner than later! Luv Ya

angie said...

You ARE a strong beautiful woman!!! Kids can for sure be hard but it's kinda like those vacations when everything goes wrong but when you look back on it, all you can remember is the good. I miss and love ya Beth!!!